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So…

October 20, 2011

What happened today…..good question, I don’t really remember, what happened today? šŸ˜› Oh wow what classes did I have this morning….ok…..ok ya I remember now. Geez, screwed up short term memory. Had a bio quiz on the stuff that was covered during the class that I missed this week. Pretty sure I got 100% though, not too worried. Got my math stuff handed in, no marks taken off (that teacher is a saint). Chem lab didn’t go too smoothly, I was hopped up on tegretol (I got that horrible dizzy high feeling) and my partner was REALLY tired so we spent most of the time giggling about absolutely nothing instead of actually working lol. I have two assignments due tomorrow that I haven’t finished yet. I’m just building up some energy and waiting for the high to fade out more before I start that. I’ve been noticing that I’m really messing up written communication. Using the wrong words, leaving out words entirely, completely messing up sentence structure. I’ll have to check my assignments several times before I print them out. I forgot something yesterday: I’m not on tegretol as needed anymore. I’m on it 3 times a day, every day now (I’m assuming because it’s spread). My lungs are killing me and I’m coughing up some really nasty looking stuff today. At least it’s coming out now. I’m going back to HellHole MRI on Saturday to get a disc with the images from my brain MRI (the one done back in May). We’ll see how that goes, I’m half expecting them to be like “sorry, we don’t do that today” even though they said it was fine to go get them on a Saturday (I have to call ahead first apparently). Will not be rushing back home or bringing my laptop to see the images, we’ll be spending some time up there sightseeing or whatever to kill time and just enjoy being out of town for a bit. That’ll be nice.

I saw a quote somewhere this morning or yesterday (don’t ask me where, I can’t remember for the life of me) that said something like “what you dreamed of doing when you were 8 years old is what you should be doing now”. I kinda laughed cause when I was around that age, I wouldn’t stop pestering my parents for a chemistry set. My favorite “toy” when I got a little older was a microscope. The disability counsellor recommended I avoided going into patient care and just used a bachelors degree in nursing to go into research and work in a sterile lab to avoid picking up infections and making my own symptoms worse. I really resisted and kinda argued against this, but deep down I know she’s right. I’m not going to give up on getting my RN certification, I’m still pushing for that, but damn do I ever love research. If I end up having to work in research instead I won’t be heart broken. I can still help other patients through research. I still want to move into education, I still want to get a masters. I know it’s going to be really hard but it’ll be worth it. I’m really curious about how to make the transition from research or patient care to teaching, I think I’ll ask my biology teacher about that (she’s a doctor, she’ll have a good idea about all that). I’m thinking of asking her also to get extra lab work in. Anything at all. Setting up/cleaning up biology labs, that sort of thing. Not to kiss her arse (I’m doing just fine in that class), but to get extra experience. I have to e-mail the peer tutoring guy as well to see if I can tutor anatomy for the PSWs. It all goes by your grades, and I had amazing grades in that class so I don’t think it would be much of a problem.

Wow my mind is really wandering. Can’t believe it’s Friday already tomorrow. Good thing though, I can use the extra sleep that I can get on weekends and that means I get to start the flexeril tomorrow! YAY! These spasms are getting to be too bloody much, I’ll be glad to be rid of them (even if the medication makes me really tired).

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