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Choking, worrying, maybe a bit of depression

August 3, 2011

When I first saw Dr. Kickass, she asked if I had any problems with choking. I said no. I’m not sure if that was an accurate answer.

I’m really not sure how often is considered normal for an adult to choke on their own saliva or a small amount of fluid. The past two days I’ve had three major choking incidents per day that made it hard to breathe, at least 5 per day that were cleared up fairly quickly with a few coughs. I’m not sure how long it’s been going on for because I wasn’t really paying attention to it. My throat has been quite sore for a while now though. This comes and goes, and I just never really thought anything of it. I clear my throat a lot, enough for my dad to mock me (he’s oh-so-sensitive :P). I’m a little bit worried about it. I can’t remember how long before my legs started to go that this choking started.

About the legs…most of my right leg is numb now, mainly a good portion of my thigh and calf, ankle isn’t as sore, but the entire leg feels really stiff. I’ve been stretching it a lot and keeping it elevated when I can because it got pretty swollen last night before bed. It’s back down to normal size now but most of the muscles are still rock hard. I have a lot of tingling in my left leg today and my left toes are numb.

I’m not sure how to take the tingles. Some of them are kinda painful, so I think they should be fairly bad pins and needles instead of tingles, but I had another TN aura and took the pills for that. It usually completely takes away the pins and needles, so it kinda worries me that I’m still feeling some of it now. Is it the meds losing effectiveness or is it the pins getting worse? How bad would it hurt if I wasn’t on those pills right now? If the pills are just losing their effectiveness again, then why is the new dosage taking away the TN completely? That’s much more intense than the pins, I don’t get it…

That’s the worst part of all of this. Not knowing what is causing all this. If I had an answer, some logical, cold, detached scientific explanation I wouldn’t feel so bad about this I guess. I was having a pretty good day despite all this crap though; I even managed to get my computer room completely cleaned up and reorganized and I love it in here now. Now that I have time to just sit here and think though,….not feeling so good. I guess I just need to keep myself as busy as possible until classes start to stay distracted. But, then I run the risk of burning myself out (feeling really friggin exhausted right now, thankfully most of dinner is already made and I have time to recoup before tonight).

I’m really not sure what I’m going to do for my birthday this year, if I do anything. It’s next month, right before classes start, but I probably won’t be able to drink because of my pills and well, I just don’t like getting drunk anymore, I’m too old for that crap now. I can’t stand being around drunk people when I’m sober, so going to a bar is out of the picture this year (and really? babysitting drunks and being DD when it’s my damn birthday? screw that).

Blah…whatever…I blog too much, I know. But, I was bored and kinda worried so I figured I would squeeze one in before dinner*

*that’s what he said.

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From → Journal

2 Comments
  1. (I like your blog…..please keep writing too much) 😉
    I have throat problems too. Sometimes it feels like I have food stuck in my throat & it hurts to swallow….like a spasm in my throat. I can breathe ok but can’t eat for a few minutes. Usually happens mid-meal, more often at lunch. Its annoying as hell.

  2. Ugh, that sounds horrible. I only get something like that when I gag on a pill and it gets kinda stuck (even once it’s washed down, it still feels like something is stuck there for a few minutes). I can barely breathe when I choke on my spit/a drink. It’s a long string of coughing like crazy and sucking in gasps of air. I hate it, I cough so hard my eyes start watering and my nose runs, so once the coughing has stopped I have to keep clearing my throat for ever because the post nasal drip just goes on and on :S It happened twice in an hour last night, I had to put a hot compress between my shoulder blades before bed cause my muscles got really sore from coughing so forcefully.

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