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Fun with symptoms *adult humour*

June 1, 2011

As I’ve mentioned before I had a bit of a twisted sense of humour and I’ve ended up saying some things to friends that are a bit inappropriate. But hey, who cares, it was funny (at least to me) and I figured some of you might need a laugh and share my sense of humour so I’ll share the few things I can remember. I’m warning you now though, this post contains adult humour so if you’re a youngin or have delicate sensibilities skip this post. Is it immature? yup. But oh well. Now onto the funny stuff.

#1) Tremor vs spasticity in hand that causes a tight fist that cannot be opened = either the most interesting handjob ever or the most horrifying one he’ll ever experience.

#2) Benefits of a cane for a girl: portable stripper pole and getting to refer to your third leg.

#3) The looks on other peoples faces after potentially grabbing my crotch and screaming like a lunatic from intense and sudden pins and needles in public.

#4) “We should have named you Ilene. Get it? I-lean?” Haha very funny dad.

#5) The look on a chiropractor’s face if bladder control is lost coincidentally at the same time as an adjustment in neck.

#6) Using a cane as a weapon to clear the lines at a liquor store because “I needs ma medicine!” (this turned into a discussion about creating handicap lanes in alcohol stores)

#7) Getting to say that grabbing my balls helps when referring to use a stressball stop fingernails from digging into my palm during spasticity in hand (especially if they are blue balls).

#8) Numbness in hands = automatically doing “the stranger” every time.

Will update with more down the road.
BTW…lost count of my backspace use for this post, somewhere over 50 times though.

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From → Journal

One Comment
  1. #5 seriously got me.

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